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madbottoms) wrote2011-10-21 08:25 pm
Choices - Chapter 24 Part 2 (Complete)
Title: Choices
Chapter 24 – Wing and a Prayer - Part 2
Pairing(s)/Characters: Jack/Ianto, Owen, Tosh, John, OCs
Rating: NC17 (overall)
Warnings: supernatural themes, violence, m/m pairing
A/N: This is it - the end! I was meant to post yesterday but didn't manage to get around to it for a number of reason. Maybe subconsciously I wanted to stretch it out because I don't want it to end. If anyone is interested I will have a PDF available soon. Just let me know if you would like a copy. Anyway, thanks again to all for your support. It’s been fun. J
24 – Wing and a Prayer – Part 2
*
JACK
o-o-o
Gray glides to the foot of the bed and sits. “Start by remembering what really happened.” Ianto untangles himself from me and moves to the door with John, giving Gray and me some space. “I got hit because I ran onto the road without looking. I should have known better. I did know better, but I did it anyway.”
My throat tightens as I remember it. “No, I kicked it toward the road out of spite. I was angry at you.”
“Stop it. You’ve been carrying this around too long. Maybe you were angry, but you didn’t mean me to get hit. That just happened. You need to let it go.” He wraps me in his arms, and I sit like that for what feels like forever.
“I just wanted you back,” I finally say.
He smiles. “You have me.”
My heart feels so heavy. “Not really. You’re still dead.”
“You’re right. I don’t have the life I would have had, but that doesn’t make my dying any more your fault.”
He looks at me for a long time, and I don’t know what to say. Finally he says, John says you need to forgive yourself, or we can’t protect you.” A smile turns the corners of his lips. “You got do it, Jack. I can’t blow my first gig because of an uncooperative client. I t wouldn’t bode well for the rest of eternity.”
“I can’t—”
His smile is gone as he cuts me off. “He says you have to figure out why you can’t let go of the guilt.”
“Because…” I fight he tears as I pull his journal from under the mattress. I think of all of my conversations with Gray in this book. All the things I told him so that he could have a little piece of me—my life. How I needed to keep him alive in my heart. “I needed it to keep from forgetting. I needed to hate myself ‘cause the pain kept it fresh. It kept part of you alive.”
All of a sudden I’m sure I’m going to throw up. There’s something inside of me that my body needs to get rid of. “How do I do this? Let it go?”
“It’s okay to feel sad about it, but you have to let go of the guilt. It has to come from inside. You need to remember what really happened.”
I rest my forehead on my knees and close my eyes, waiting for the nausea to stop, but it only gets stronger as I relive the scene in my head. Me kicking the ball toward the road, Gray running after it, the screech of tyres and my scream and the car hits him and he falls to the ground.
My eyes snap open and I roll and dry heave over the bin. Gray’s arms are around me, and he pulls me to his shoulder, where I start to shake.
Finally, I lift my head and look at him, tears streaking my cheeks. “Why’d you have to run out on the road?”
He shrugs.
I’m not surprised by how mad I feel, but I am surprised when I realise I’m mad at him. I push away. “You should have stopped—been more careful.”
He nods. “But there was nothing you could do. It was an accident.”
I drop my face into my hands and breathe back the anger. When my shaking slows, I pick up the journal and press it to my forehead, then hold it out to him. “I did this for you…or more for me, I guess. All along, you’ve been the only person I could really talk to.”
He takes it from my hand and smiles. “I’ve been talking back. Did you hear me? Told you to stay away from him,” he says, glancing toward Ianto.
My heart sinks. “Why do you hate Ianto so much?”
“Why? You’re kidding, right? He almost got you killed, Jack. He’s one of them.”
“He’s one of me,” I correct, my voice raised.
Ianto and John stop whispering and look at us. Ianto steps forward, concern on his face. “He’s entitled to his opinion, and he’s got good reason to think the way he does. I did almost het you killed…more than once.”
“No. That would be me that almost got you killed,” I remind him.
Gray looks at Ianto, his expression still sour. “I hate the thought of you anywhere near him, and if you hurt him—in any way—I’ll kill you myself.”
Ianto nods, holding Gray’s eyes with his. “Duly noted.”
Ianto turns and looks hard at John, and I know he’s thinking the same thing as I am. John said Gray was the best angel for this job, but I’m starting to wonder.
Gray softens his posture and leans his forehead into mine. His voice is low, meant just for me. “Jack, I’m having a really hard time with this. Are you sure? About Ianto, I mean? I just can’t make myself trust a demon, no matter what John says.”
“I’m sure, Gray. I love him and he loves me. Can’t you just read his mind? Then you’d see.”
“Sorry, I’m not high enough up the food chain for that particular skill. Dominions or higher.”
“Please, just give him a chance.”
His eyes harden again as he glances toward Ianto, but then he pulls me into a hug, and I hear the smile in his voice. “You’re not gonna pull that Sway crap on me, are you?”
I smile into his shoulder. “That depends entirely on you.”
*
IANTO
o-o-o
I watch Jack with Gray as I stand near the door with John, and I know this is it. Talk to me outside, I think, and he nods and slips through the door with me to the hall.
“He’s ready,” I say.
“Yep.”
“Tell me you’ll take care of him. The look in Michael’s eyes…” I shudder.
John leans into the wall. “We got his ass covered, which by the way is a pretty nice one.” He quirks a smile.
“Can you be serious for like two minutes? And eyes off, he’s mine.”
He scowls at me. “Fine. Stop stressing. The Almighty knows he’s special. And remember, Moses’ life didn’t exactly suck. He’ll be fine. He’s not going anywhere.”
“But he’s not staying with me either, is he? I just need to know he’ll be okay before I let him go.”
His eyes hold mine, and his jaw clenches as he contemplates that. “I’m not going to pretend that nothing’s going to change, but what happens from here is up to Jack. You’re not a demon anymore. You’re human, with a clean soul and a completely clean slate. If Jack still wants you,” he almost chokes on the words, “then there’s no reason you can’t be together. And by the smell of you and that room, I’d say it’s a safe bet he does.”
And that’s the key: if he still wants me, as much as I want him. But he’ll belong to Heaven. To John. Will he still want me after? His life will outgrow me—the tagalong, used-to-be-demon. It won’t be long before he doesn’t need me or want me. I crack open the door and gaze at him. He looks so tired, but he also looks at peace, and I know it’s time.
John pushes through the door, and I walk behind him, stopping just inside. But the Jack holds his hand out to me and I stride across to his side, needing to feel his touch.
“You’re ready,” I tell him, and he nods his affirmation. “Good,” I say to myself. “This is good.” I repeat a little louder—for him. Then I kiss him quickly and stand.
I turn to John. “Okay,” I say, giving him the signal.
He smirks. “Okay what?”
“Tag him. He’s ready.”
“It was done before we walked back into the room. What’d you expect, that we’d have some big ‘Pomp and Circumstance’ thing?”
I glower at him. “You’re such an asshole. I thought maybe you’d give him a heads-up, or something.”
“If he’s ready, why does he need a heads-up?”
“Hello. Still in the room,” he says, glowering up at us.
“Should I have given you a heads-up, Jack?” John teases.
Jack grins. “No, but maybe Ianto would have liked one.”
I stare down at him. “What are you talking about?”
Jack’s eyes are brighter than I’ve ever seen them. “Tag—you’re it.”
I look at John, stunned. “You’re joking!”
He smiles and shrugs. “It was one of Jack’s conditions. Plus, you’ve impressed the right deity, though Michael was less than thrilled.”
I try to digest what John is saying. “I’m tagged…for Heaven…” I say, trying it on for size.
“Could you at least pretend to be happy about it? Otherwise I may have to take it back.”
I feel the grin spread across my face as Jack reaches up for my hand. I grab it and sit down next to him on the bed and kiss him passionately. “Holy shit!”
Gray shrugs and cracks a dubious smile. “You can say again. A demon tagged for Heaven…and then some.” He shakes his head.
“So, what’s going to happen?” Jack asks. “I mean with life…college and all…” his gaze shifts for an instant to me and then back to John. “…you guys.”
“What happens from now is up to you.” John reaches down and touches his face and I can tell that he’d really give up his wings if he asked. But he knows that Jack has made his choice. He looks at our linked hands and smiles ruefully. “It looks like you’ve already started on your way.”
“And me? What does it mean for me? I ask curiously.
John’s expression changes and he glowers at me. “Well, like Michael said, it’s not a free pass. We have plans for you Ianto Jones, and this is only the beginning.”
And that’s all folks!
no subject
Love the twist on who's 'good' and 'bad' with John and Ianto.
The idea at the end of the tagged ex demon is fitting after the changes he has gone through.
You made me smile you made me cry....fab
no subject
As for Ianto, it couldn't have ended any other way.
Cheers