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continuing on....
 

~~~

 

Later, they lay stargazing as they snuggled by the fire, still buzzing from their incredible round of lovemaking.

 

“You know, it could be like this always, Ennis. We could have us a real sweet life. You and me on our own spread.”

 

“Two men living together? I don’t know, Jack.”

 

“C’mon, Ennis. We’re practically doin’ it now, anyways. I mean, I’m at your cabin almost every night and when I’m not, I get so lonesome. I just wanna be with you every day and night. I need to, Ennis.”

 

As much as Ennis wanted to be with Jack, he still didn’t think two men living together was a good idea. As a young boy, he had seen what could happen to two men who did that, and as much as he was at ease with his own sexual preferences, this part of the world was still behind the times. Ennis sat up and picked up a long stick, toying with the fire.

 

“Things can happen to men like us, if we’re not careful.” Images of tire irons and blood curdling screams ran through Ennis’ head and all he could think of was that it could be Jack at the end of it. “Naw, Jack. I just don’t think we can. If this takes us at the wrong place, wrong time...”

 

“We can be careful, Ennis.” Jack got up and faced Ennis, looking him in the eyes.

 

“Tell ya what. There was these two fellas who shacked up years ago and thought they were careful. One day, one of ‘em was found in a ditch with his dick near ripped off.”

 

“You saw this?”

 

“Yep, my daddy made sure I did. For all I know he was one of ‘em who did it. See, Jack, no matter how careful you are, you can never be too sure.”

 

“I’m sorry ya had to see that, Ennis, but ya can’t live your life in fear. If ya did, what kind of life would it be? Don’t do this to us, Ennis. We love each other and want to be together. Let’s just do it and we’ll work it out. Please, Cowboy?” Jack implored.

 

Ennis remained silent and so Jack continued. “My Uncle Harold gave me some money he saved for me.”

 

“You’re Uncle? You’re daddy not give you anything?”

 

“Nothing but a lot of bruises and bad memories. He was a mean son of a bitch.” A haunted look passed over Jack’s face, but was replaced by something else unreadable.

 

“I’m sorry, Jack.”

 

“I’m not. Don’t matter no more, he’s dead,” Jack said in a cold and emotionless voice.

 

“And your momma?”

 

“Gone,” he whispered shakily. “I don’t wanna talk about that.”

 

Ennis sensed there was more to that situation than Jack had said, but he guessed Jack would tell him when he was ready.

 

“Anyway, as I was saying, I got us a start. It’s not much, but we could get us a small place and build it up. Have us a nice operation. I remember you saying how much you’d love to have your own horses to breed and train. We could do that, Ennis. We really could.” Jack’s enthusiasm was evident in his excitement. He really believed this could work and he was determined to get Ennis to agree.

 

“Jack, did ya not hear a word I said? This could be dangerous!”

 

“Fuck dangerous! I’m not gonna be scared. Not of anyone or anything.” Jack stood up quickly and kicked the dirt aggressively. “I’m not gonna give up, Ennis. It’s what we both want, why can’t ya see that?”

 

“I do want it, Jack.” Ennis rose to join him and took him in his arms. Stiff at first but soon Jack melted into his embrace. “I am scared, Jack. I just don’t want nothin’ to happen to you, Darlin’. I love ya too much.”

 

“Ennis, ya gotta stop thinkin’ on what might happen and just take a chance. It could be real sweet, honey.” Jack kissed him.

 

“Did you just call me ‘honey’?”

 

“I guess I did. Is that okay?”

 

“It sounds nice coming from yer lips. Yer very sweet lips.” Ennis caressed them with his fingers and felt Jack shiver against him.

 

“So, Ennis? At least think on it some more before ya make a final decision. I just know it will be great.”

 

“Okay, Jack, I’ll think on it some. But I’m not makin’ no promises, ya hear?”

 

“I hear ya,” Jack murmured as he sucked on Ennis’ earlobe. “C’mon, love me again, honey.”

 

They made love again and again that evening until they couldn’t move. But by the end, Jack had convinced Ennis to say yes.

 

“Thank you, Ennis. I know you’re still reluctant to do this and you’re doin’ it for me…”

 

“No, Jack. I mean yeah, I’m doin’ it for you, but I’m doin’ it for me, too. It’s gonna be hard, no doubt about that, but I’ve said I’ll do it and I don’t break my promises.”

 

“I believe you, Ennis. C’mon, Cowboy, let’s go home.”

 

And on that mountain where they declared their love for each other, they made a commitment to begin their sweet life together, too.

 

~~~

 

“Jack? Hey, Kid, you with me?” Rufus asked, giving his shoulder a squeeze.

 

“Yeah... yeah.”

 

Rufus could see a different kind of emotion flash over Jack’s face and wasn’t sure what to make of it. “Jack, what are you thinking?”

 

“You still have the number of that doctor, Rufus?”

 

Rufus just smiled, relief evident. “What are ya saying, Kid?”

 

It was as if all of a sudden something snapped and he knew what he needed to do. He wanted that sweet life they had promised each other.

 

“I’m ready to come home.”

 

 

~~~

 

TBC


on 2008-07-06 06:27 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] torry28.livejournal.com
Thank God Jack is reaching out, he will mend. I'm sure it won't be easy but if his goal is to win Ennis back and I believe it is he will be able to climb any mountain and reach the top. I hope it is not to long before he is ready to search for Ennis.
Thank you for a very moving chapter, story.
Hugs
Torry

on 2008-07-06 08:15 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] madbottoms.livejournal.com
Hey Torry

I'm so glad you liked these last posts. I was actually thinking of you when I posted them earlier becuase I know how much emotion I drag out of you with this story.

Jack pretty much did hit rock bottom but now he has really remembered what he has waiting for him. He wants to get back what they had and his memories of that earlier time can help him on his way.

I also want to say thank you so very much for the pressies. They have really made me smile. My ankle is better and I am off crutches but I won't be able to get back to my sport for at least another 3-4 weeks.

Thanks again and hopefully the next chapter won't be too far away.

Hugs

Sandy

on 2008-07-06 07:51 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] mira986.livejournal.com
~Finally, Jack is asking for help. It was about time. But, I think he needed to hit his bottom to reach out and ask for help. He needs to get better and needs to get back with Ennis, to keep the promise they gave to each other on Brokeback. They are meant to be, and I know that you'll put them together again. Thank you!

I hope that your ankle is much better now.~

Mira

on 2008-07-07 09:40 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] madbottoms.livejournal.com
Hi again

Yep, finally. Those memories have finally help some light into all the darkness he feels at the moment. It's a good start.

Hugs

Sandy

on 2008-07-08 01:06 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] taranryan-13.livejournal.com
Wow 2 months has past since Ennis left Jack. Jack was sure a mess during that time. I glad Rufus help Jack a little bit during that time. I also glad that Jack sees now that he need help if he want the sweet life that he try so hard to get Ennis to agree in the begining. Love the story and I am looking forward for more.

Neyla

on 2008-07-08 09:49 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] madbottoms.livejournal.com
Hi Neyla

Yeah we're seeing some progress here. There is still a little ways to go but we're at least heading in the right direction at last.

Hugs

Sandy

on 2008-07-09 02:30 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] yvonne07.livejournal.com
Just one word: WOW!
I really loved your last chapters!
It's such a wonderful story.
Hugs,
Yvonne

P.S. Hope your ankle is better.

on 2008-07-09 09:18 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] madbottoms.livejournal.com
Hi Yvonne

Thankss o much. I hope you continue to read and love. I should have the next part up soon.

Hugs

Sandy

on 2008-07-11 09:57 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] sweetje.livejournal.com
Oh, I love how this chapter ended! Jack is finally ready to get better and get back to Ennis. Thank God!
What a wonderful chapter, full of sweet memories and love. I'm looking forward to your next update on this fantastic story. : )
Debra

on 2008-07-11 11:01 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] madbottoms.livejournal.com
Hey Debra

I'm very pleased you liked this chapter and I'm so happy you want more.

Jack still has a ways to go but he's finally heading in the right direction.

I have the next chapter mostly written and hopefully I can get it posted in the next few days.

Hugs

Sandy

on 2008-07-11 06:28 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] bbm-lover.livejournal.com
Hey Sandy,
Just read chap 9 & 10. Jack was sure in a bad way, wow 2 months since Ennis left. Glad Jack didn't kill himself trying to forget. How could Ennis abandon the business he built? Jack was in a bad way when he left. Lucky for them, Rufus made sure things carried on at the ranch. Happy at last that Jack came to his senses and wants to get help with his problem, hopefully he'll start to heal now. I dont know Sandy, I thought Ennis should be doing for Jack what Rufus is doing? What has Ennis been doing these 2 months anyway? Cant wait to read more. You really delve into Jack's pain very well. Thanks for writing this. Hugs.
Jess

on 2008-07-11 11:50 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] madbottoms.livejournal.com
Hey Jess

Well ya know I'm a big fan of 'tough love' in a lot of circumstances and this is one of them. It helped Jack see what he was doing and although it was painful it was necessary.

We will get to hear about Ennis soon, where, what, etc. I wanted to concentrate on Jack more so now so that we can see his pain and watch him eventually find his way out of the dark.

Hugs
Sandy

on 2008-07-16 07:59 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] haljbg.livejournal.com
Hi Sandy,
The first part was really sad. I am glad that Jack is finally ready to get some help.
The memories were beautiful. Hope Jack will never lose them again.
Thanks for another great chapter
Emmy

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